You Know Somethings Wrong When I Only Have A Snowglobe

I have twittered it and I have grumbled about it to friends and family but now I am going to get it out of my system because every time I hear someone mention Black Friday it makes me grit my teeth and start bitchin’. Why you may inoocently ask? Why when anyone who knows me knows that this is one of my favorite days of the year? Well I will tell you why. In all the years (at least 12) that I have dragged my over turkey filled body out of bed at 3:00 am to drive to whatever store I would begin my freezing, shivering insane shopping trip I have always had a list and rarely didn’t get everything.

Now some years the list of deals I wanted was fairly small, other years like 2 years ago it was massive and I was 5 stores in at 3 minutes to eleven running to the checkout with the last huge deal on my list, I made it, and that year I saved well over five hundred dollars.

This year, well what can I say, the deals sucked and if they didn’t then they didn’t even come close to what I was looking for. So I had a very small list, 3 items as a matter of fact and I got one, and a lousy Mickey Mouse snowglobe I didn’t even want. Here’s just a little of the day I will call “The Worst Black Friday Ever!”

4am JC Penny- received snowglobe, looking for one item seen in ad, looking, still looking, rubbing bleery tired eyes, spot sales woman, ask “I saw a (censored til Christmas) in your ad, now I see you have (censored) but I can’t seem to find the (censored) one you show.”
Sales woman- “Oh we don’t actually carry those in the store, you would need to order that off line.” Me *looking baffled I’m sure* - ” Are you serious? I just drove like 60 miles and I could have just ordered it? And you don’t carry them?”
Sales woman- “Nope we don’t but if you order it online today you will get the same deal as the ad.” Me-*walking away, confused, tired, grumbling incoherantly.*

4:30am-6am Sitting outside of (censored store) waiting for them to open

6am Enter (censored store) instant success, duh theres knowone here.

7am Hook up with Markus at Office Depot?Max? find him at back of store waiting in a checkout line, dump his sister off with him and run to Target for last item I would like to get.

7:15am Battling insane amounts of people just talking and looking confused in the isles of Target, get to area of (censored item) and start looking, and looking, getting pushed and slammed into, still looking, getting pissed,….find sales…kid, ask “Where are the 60 dollar (censored)”
Kid- *points to area I’ve been looking at for ten minutes* ” They should be there.”
Me- “They are not.”
Kid- “Well they should be right there.” *pointing again*
Me- “But there not.”
Kid- “Oh they should be.”
Me “Yep, but there not.”
Kid- “Did you see them in the ad?”
Me- (thinking- No I made them up) “Yes, they were on the page with the (censored) right by the (censored).”
Kid- *looking smart*- “Oh well we don’t carry everything in the ad.”
Me- *WHAAA!?!?* (thinking- you are so lucky the crowd is pulling you away from me because I’m ready to throttle someone!!!)

8am-8:30am Waiting at IHOP for Markus,Larry and Sara,… and waiting and waiting.

8:30am Go to Office Depot?Max? arrive just as they are coming out the door crabbing about there own horrible Black Friday.

8:30-10am Waiting to eat a crappy, slow, coldish breakfast at a over stuffed resturant.